Let me hear you call my name.
Jacinta.July 1988 just the way you are. simplistic yet loving. More than words.
I know you love me, too.
*year-end trip with sweets!*graduation trip? *sleepovers! *wedding planner classes! *early childhood classes? *longchamp/kate spate bag *watch *a pair of new sunglasses You were here too?
|
well, its the last day.
Saturday, December 31, 2005
last day of 2005!! its the countdown tonight! it meant that a new year will signify new resolutions. hmmz. have i completed those resolutions that i meant this year? before i touch on that. haven't i not been updating for days? hahas. well, i was away. but still in singapore. but not much to elaborate. except that i am aching all over. and i need to replenish much of my sleep. hahas. back to talking about resolutions, this year. in fact, every year i made quite a few. but this year's, have i forgotten? i think i have. but i know for sure. my academic side has not been fulfilled. so i have to work harder next year. then as usual. the health of my family members. and so on. then this year. aside resolutions, have you down anything that made yourself regretted, or something that you wanted to do, but in the end, you didn't? there are bound to have. i have mine too. but since it is over. no point thinking back and list it right. jus think thru about it, and throw it over. if someone wants to stay happy, he/she shouldn't be dragged down by such stuffs that would dumpen the mood. and further more. we shouldn't even turn back and look at things that have happened. whether it has been a good or a bad one. esp. bad ones. don't keep remembering things of the bad, and don't let it leave a scar in the heart. treat it as a bad experience. becos' down the road, you know that better things will soon come along. all right then ppl, a new year begins tml and happy countdown!! -- so tired but yet to enjoy.
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
 back in singapore for around two days. went for the christmas gathering as usual yesterday. then received 3 presents as usual too. from my relatives. every year. then as my age gets older, its harder for them to buy presents for me. so they have to get me practical stuffs. a belt, a tee, and a calendar planner. (see above pic) hahas. and the planner was cool.i wonder where did my aunt get it from. it doesn't look like it can be bought in singapore though.well, she just flew back from frankfurt, maybe it was from there. hahas. then i m off for enjoyment from tml to thurs. hahas. and it was daddy who granted me the permission. and he wanted to pass me some money, but mummy didn't allow. so in the end, i get none. poor me. sobx. i have to use my own money instead. well, holidays are going to be over soon. and in another 4 days time, another year will arrive. and more things are bound to happen. because new year is coming. hahas. oh well, waiting for the countdown moment every year though. its fun. very fun in fact. and we kids usually sleep real late. just so fast. 2005 is gone. and we have to prepare for 2006. means spring cleaning is on the way. coming. mummy is gonna nag sooner or later. hahas. well, then let me enjoy first then suffer. hahas. -- merry christmas!
Sunday, December 25, 2005
yups. just arrived back from malacca. been a busy one though. and this coming week, i have another outing to go to. hahas. should be fun i supposed. and definitely in means of play, how would i forgot that the marketing survey has been permitted, i have icas to study for, and tutorials to complete? hahas. well, malacca doesn't have much things to shop or play for. so if any doesn't received small gifts from me, real sorry, i wanted to, but i couldn't find those of suitable criteria. ;) idea is for daddy to meet up with his friend in malacca that's all. but their food was great. real great.and it was coincidental that stef went to malaysia today while i came back from there. and upon reaching back, my phone, well, was filled with a few messages that's all. and was busy clearing stuffs till now. before i can settle down and blog an entry. has another christmas gathering tml afternoon with my relatives. well, a belated one in fact. so yups. receiving christmas gifts tml. hahas. christmas is fun, but it seems like my presents every year falls in the same category of clothes. but its all right. i need them anyway. hahas. well, nevertheless. i got something for myself too. while i am away in malacca. my new year clothes! but it is not complete yet. i will get them in full since i am back in singapore now. oh well, will blog in again when i m slightly free. till then. merry christmas once again. heys just for info.
Thursday, December 22, 2005
well, it has been a busy day today. early in the morning i am off to accompany my brother for his doctor's appointment. then after that, it was mine for the braces. and i just checked with my dentist of why wouldn't she remove my braces. now i know the reasons why, so well, i have to bring it through the year of 2005.and then i'll be off out of singapore as of tomorrow onwards all the way till christmas and i think i will only have time to update on the 26th. and please. my phone is not with me these few days. so no point looking for me. anything. drop me an email, tag my board or whatsoever to inform me of stuffs. gotten ting's message this afternoon that the pom survey has been permitted and we can proceed with the things that we need to do. but that will have to wait till i am back in singapore. so meanwhile they can only focus on their job scope. sorry guys. ;) oh well then that's it. till then. merry christmas. its just one in a million.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
hmmz. went to give tuition just now. feeling so tired now. and now i am praying so hard that daddy is going to nod and give his permission. well, with strict discipline from young. this is not an exception. haven't really started on my studies yet. and soon i will be off for a short trip.so i think i must start on them soon. real soon i supposed. are my words too harsh at times? oh well, perhaps it has been a habit since young in the family. my words usually don't go round the bushes. and though i know i am going to hurt people's feelings. i will still say it. or maybe, is silence the best answer whenever we are faced with problems we don't know how to answer? mood been slightly down these days. haven't been to something that would make me feeling light enough. my best pal doesn't have time for me though. poly mates...haiz. they have not known me to the deepest point yet. or maybe a few of them, yes. but, some things just have to have abrupt changes suddenly. i always thought he knew, but i think i was wrong. very wrong in fact. maybe because that's what i expect, so the point of disappointment falls real hard. when finally we settled one, there comes another. it doesn't seem to stop in any case. that's something i didn't hope for. but it did happen. and even if i have the world of time, its no point, because i don't know how to start a solution to salvage it back on track. -- some things are just stuffs i didn't want. but...
Monday, December 19, 2005
as of 18 dec'05:went out today to change my hp's spare batt. it doesnt have extras in the shop! the person will call me when the stock arrives. that will be another 2 days or so. then went shopping. unknowingly. bought 2 skirts, a bag and cosmetics. and that's it. nearly spent a hundred bucks on those. then went to see my family doctor. he just ask me to take more rest in order to improve my gastric condition. though there were increase in dosage. here's the start of the 2 weeks break. other than studying, finishing up projects and tutorials. perhaps its time to let me reflect what has actually happened to me. is it because due to the events that has happened to me that made me to i am, or just that i was already done with the impact since secondary school? the time that my best buddy have for me gets lesser ever since her school projects has been on the go and of course her relationship. the chance of finding her to talk gets even worse needless to say. and to find someone else to confide in, that's even harder. so what to do? keep them all inside the heart. till she has the time to spare then. friends always say that i have the tendancy to think much further than what is needed. but how people actually know why is this happening? no one hopes to be like this. i can tell this straight. not even me. i always say its just a habit as time goes by. perhaps its just a smokescreen to bring people thru'. when certain things happen and thus the need of protecting yourself gets higher. the tendancy of one thinking further gets higher. it cannot be blamed. perhaps right now thinking back. i was too blinded by things around me in secondary school. don't need to ask if there are any particular ones. there are too many already, in friendships, relationships, kinships.which i myself gets confused at times.-- as of 19 dec'05: well, went for my accts make up lecture in the morning. was feeling tired though. but drag myself there. its ACCTS!! one of my worst off module manz. will someone pls help? (yes i know. shan is.) then i went home after that. cos really don't feel like going anywhere else. not in the mood to. in deciding. i must start learning how to leave things alone as what they are without thinking of what would happen in the future. perhaps it will lead to a more carefree me. at the current position, i don't have relationships burden, no family burdens too. i should be free at mind. i shouldn't be thinking much more than i am supposed to. there is a time that i will reach the other side of the ocean. there will be a day that i will reach my limits too. that is something i must always bear in mind. i must learn how to get independent too. people wouldn't be always around me to guide me along. all rites. i am off for dinner already. -- phew. finally.
Friday, December 16, 2005
well, finally submitted stats proj today. a burden off le. but there come another 2 more on the way. then can relax a little and it leads me to the start of my hols. 2 weeks. but i think i have lots of studies to catch up somehow. so my 2 weeks aren't exactly for rest. need to study for icas that are starting when school reopens again. and 2 weeks pass very fast de. then just finish french medicure for my fingers.(ting helped me to choose the right tone of pink to suit me. hahas. tks.) and mummy complained that she doesn't like me doing all these things. but its normal for girls to be vain. its our right. hahas. she feels that ever since i enter poly, i m no longer the girl who she is originally from sec sch already. ppl have to change to adapt to changes de wat. but she wans me to stay the same way i m all these years. haiz. and seriously. we were taking photos like nobody's business today. from within the school compound to outside the school, then at the train station, on the train, then at shopping places. hahas. we were not in the right mind today i supposed. but everyone did have fun. pictures. hmmz. waiting for cat to send over, perhaps not tonite. everyone is tired enough. all rites. tiring day. till then. -- one problem after another.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
today was a bad bad day. i must say it this way. our stats proj esp. lots of hiccups along the way this week. and i did something terribly wrong today. (perhaps i shd be reprimanding myself for this.) i went to overlap the new copy of data with the old one. which made yisong and shan redo their stuffs again. so sorry!!! then finally ting and i compile it while they set off for hm after finishing it. and till now. things are going fine. shan is worried. me too. but as things are going fine then it shd be ok. and then when we submit it tml to ms teo. then everything will be all right le. things seems to get better as compared to yesterday. still holding on to the quietness somehow here and there. and maybe mood swings are affecting too. things are just not getting too successful somehow and my eyelid are twitching. dear me. how. already twitch for some days le. then these few days due to the rush to complete the proj. sad to say. my gastric is affected. this time. really. so i m on medication after so long. again. poor me huh. then need to get new bag. new things. and to be done within the 2 weeks holidays. then have marketing proj and effective proj too. aiya, 2 weeks hols is equal to no hols too. hahas. -- spare me off the troubles.
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
finish off my access ica today. nth much. its just as usual. a pass will be sufficient. alone this week, though its just the week before the term break starts. the stats proj dateline is going to drive me, or perhaps my grp to go off the hook anytime. and not only the stats proj dateline. there are alone too many things that will agitate me to flare at anytime le. or maybe i wun. i will just keep my cool and keep quiet. well. that's the prob when one has a slight prob of a split personality. maybe i have. maybe not. my heart is like... so heavy manz. but things are like. there are no places that i can talk thru to. i mean some things are not meant to be said out.consider it a blessing or a worry.hopefully i am able to take it easy in my stride. cos my temper is consider not too bad. can tolerate for some time de. and i think bad karma is arriving le. but it is happening to ppl ard me. and my eyelid has been jumping for days le. i really wonder what is going to happen.haiz. mood has been slightly down these few days. then after stats comes the marketing. headaches just come once and for all. or should i say one after another. the past was terrible. the future? i dun dare to think about it. the present is cruel enough. some things are just not for repetition. ppl will tend to get affected more. some words are not too. ppl will get tired of them eventually. some facts lie before the eyes, but ppl are unwilling to accept. some lies that are just for show, ppl will tend to believe in it. some pain are just redundant, but ppl chose to go thru it. how true are those? i know they do apply on me sometimes. but is this just the real world, the reality? -- consider it bad or good?
Monday, December 12, 2005
well. hasnt been blogging for a few days le. (and shan is rushing me to. hahas.) rite. hmmz. what has happen on fri. nothing unusual. just the accts ica. it didnt went well though. but its over le. doesnt matter in anyways. then on sat. as usual slacking at home. hahas. then shan and ting came over in the evening. and i was having a craving for curry chicken! so i asked my grandma to cook it for me. hahas. so dinner was curry chicken with french loaf that nite. then yesterday. wanted to blog in. but i was having gastric so decided to turn in early instead. but yesterday was quite a fruitful before the night arrives. i had a 2 hr tuition in the morning. then we proceed off to IMM, giordano and daiso. hahas. then i spent quite an amt in giordano actually. and i was interested in their latest addition, the jacket. the small one. but their cutting is quite small leh. then how m i supposed to wear spag to sch. esp when i m planning to get one from double index? hahas. well. we shall see about it. and i think i must stop shopping for a moment till i get my pay. lol. and then my health prob, mainly my gastric and margaine. seriously. my gastric hasnt been acting up for quite some months le. but dunno what happen, recently these few days, i have to be on medication to sustain the pain, esp. in the nite. (and i just got to know that the increased dosage is actually not for me, is for mummy. but the original dosage no longer takes effect on me anymore. so i have to take the increased dosage one.) as for margaine. not too bad. it only affects me when ica arrives. all rites. i think that's enough to cover for the moment. i need to get busy with other stuffs. -- just as things would go.
Thursday, December 08, 2005
the same old routine happens. going to sch, staying back for projects, coming home. and the cycle goes on again the next day. and it's gonna to last quite a few weeks in fact. with the accts ica tml (which i m praying so hard that it wouldn't be difficult), and access ica next wed, stress is coming along without knowing. then it would then be our 2 week break. finally. nevertheless, the projects that are coming along. are the stats and marketing. with the stats project dateline just next friday, well, ppl are rushing their project of cos that includes my group too. and then for marketing. will work it out immediately after we are done with stats. (and its different grp members anyway.) health hasnt been in tip top condition these few days. gastric is acting up recently again. and i practically refused to take the medicine. i dun wan the process of taking medicine becomes a habit for me in the future. i will just have to try other ways to endure the pain. i know, if gastric is delayed, it will turn into gastric ucler then the disasterious things will come along. but...haiz. talking about disasterious things, we always say who and who is our best fren, and we know that definitely in times of need, they will be by our side. but actually how many can when a real disaster lands onto you? i have nv experienced having big events to occur on me, to test the bond btw stef and i. of cos i wan to test the bonds i have with my poly frens. but we know each other less in a year, to predict this result is too early le. but for stef and i, its different becos we are frens of 5 years alr. all rites. i need to get back to the revision for my accts ica tml. and then to dreamland later. ;) -- it couldn't get any better.
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
well, got my sim card already. so my old no is in use le. hahas. finally. waited for 2 days manz. then went to school as usual on a tues morning. its the longest day in the week. then as usual. see ppl that we always see. haiz. sometimes it's good to learn how to clean up certain mess after creating it and not leave it for someone else to settle it. before any misunderstandings cropped up. cos having outsider party to settle is no good. nv. another concept that i just understood not long.just like i lost my phone, it contains impt stuffs inside. wht are greetings or messages, or even contacts. having to lose it this time, perhaps god wants me to understand that some things are not fated to be with me even if i keep them by my side. they are fated to be lost. at that point of time. to drag me out of situations. and maybe to slow down my footsteps to see things clearly, use my heart to feel, before getting into any. sometimes, esp affairs of the heart, are just like a piece of mirror. when it is at the peak, the mirror looks so beautiful in a piece, able to see two persons together. but when it is smashed, just like when the relationship is off, or unable to start, it has cracks. and no matter how u mend it, the cracks remain. and its for permanent. so rather than keeping those pieces which might cut yourself, throw it away and get a new one then. perhaps i was glad, i was able to walk out of the situation rather than holding on. well, such things we have to take it easy. taking it too seriously will only kill yourself eventually. holding doesnt mean that the other one who hold it on too. they might have let it go already. long ago. for ppl who are still holding on to something that is not worth it, perhaps its time to wake up! the world of illusion is not fun at all. not at all. aiya. nearly forgotten that fri got accts ica. hahas. back to the accts tutorial le. enough for tonite le. -- another bad bad day.
Monday, December 05, 2005
today was a bad bad day. at first i thought i could get my sim card by tonite. but dunno how the delivery ppl handle. they thought we were not at home. wth. so they just went off. so now i have to wait till tml evening when i get home before i get hold of my rightfully sim card. argh....!!!! so temporarily. i m using my grandma's line. today i was using my bro's line. argh...!!!school is as usual today. it can't be too fun anyway. and what, nurul lost her phone this morning too. the losing of hp comes into trend huh. dunno what will be the next thing that will be in trend to be lost. hahas. aiya. i need to get back to my marketing tutorials. -- what a day.
Sunday, December 04, 2005
today is not a lucky day. definitely not. say something. i lost my phone!!! and its like its the first time lor. so sad manz. and my sim card can only be replaced tml evening. so i have to use my bro's line temporarily. but luckily i got a replacement of phone today. went to get the nokia 6111. hahas. nice. ladies' phone in fact. hahas. but still feeling the pinch that my data in my other phone are all gone. hmph. wonder who is that evil fellow who took it. then syafie called me out of the blue today. got a shock. really. didnt expect him to. hahas. chatted for a while though. then managed to get to know some updates somehow. hahas. yups. will meet up when we have time ya. tutorials this week. ok la. but quite a lot. so it took me some time and i m not done with them yet. argh... all rites. tonite cant blog in too much. dun feel like blogging too much too. -- a usual saturday.
Saturday, December 03, 2005
its a usual saturday as usual. stuck at home with my tv shows and my tutorials to complete. ok la. did went out for a while just now. got show's gai ban le. hahas. the mvs are real nice la. then received sms from my junior. or godbro la. it has been lyk a year plus that i received msg from him. and he just msg me yest nite. got a shock or surprised somehow. hahas. nothing much to blog in tonite. just that i m stuck with my tutorials. argh...hahas. lol. all rites then. that's it. -- it takes two hands to clap.
Friday, December 02, 2005
went for lecture as usual on a friday morning. met up with janis to have lunch together today. along came shuting too. hahas. she know another fren. no harm. then just nice my slippers broke. but it was not too bad. and then ting was meeting her fren at a later time, so we two decided to take a walk around nyp campus, while janis went to the access lab to continue her oral comm proj. and now we know. we took around one hour plus to finish walking the whole campus. (which i supposed so). and it is surprising that i still can walk when my slippers are in that kind of situation. hahas. so decided to meet up with mummy at je to buy new shoes. hahas. and ting went with me too. (then after she went to meet her fren) so now. we have two pairs of shoes which are the same!!! hahas. we bought same design, same colour!! hahas. different shoe size that's all. lol.it seems like by not bothering about it. it relieves much much more. really. nothing further to blog in tonite. perhaps leave a few words here... if we met each other under a different sky, maybe then things would be much better between you and I, we could always hold on to this one special thing we share... sounds familiar? its a small part from the song, "one last" though so many things have happened throughout this time, nevertheless i still want to, thank you for being there when i need you, thank you for being so patient always, thank you for lending a listening ear, a crying shoulder, and lastly, becos' it's too precious a gift to meet... to make me remember forever for life...... this above are for ppl who are always there to accompany my times of difficulty or joy. they know who they are. (anyway there are only a few of them). -- start of the last month of the year.
Thursday, December 01, 2005
its the 1st of december and yes, it is the last month of the year already. time is passing fast indeed. it is passing so fast that i dun even know how many things have i missed along this year. and along with that, number of regrets that i have too. i gradually noticed that my feelings are easily affected by the people around me. esp those that i concern about. is it becos my heart is not firm enough to withstand emotions happening around? then went for econs ica today. the questions are not too easy. but suppose a pass is not too difficult i think. hahas. then wanna to watch chicken little today de. the mandarin version de. at tampines gv. but decided to forgo it when stef dun wan to watch the chinese version de. so i just have to pray hard that the dvd will be out in both english and mandarin version lor. hahas. lol. well, guess there is nothing else to add on le. quite tired after this week's ica. -- |
Goodbye.
|